Sunday, April 26, 2009

Life's a gamble

Stepping in and out of puddles is what I've been doing the past couple of weeks.
It's so difficult trying to make wise decisions without having ample time to think things through.
I wouldn't say I've blundered everything; but most times I find ways of improving my decisions only after they've been MADE! *ARgh* Of course; I try my best to consult my family and industry veterans before doing anything drastic; but truth is... nobody has time to permanently be focused on my worries. Armed with every valuable 2 cent's worth I gather; I have to make the final choice; and DAMN it isn't easy when I'm juggling so many responsibilities.

I know for a fact that I'm not ready for this sort of pressure; I'm not built for it, but truth is; I have no choice.
One foot in the water... the waddle across unknown waters continue! Haha It's not an option for me to say I'm afraid, and it's not an option to say that I can't be responsible for things either. I've made this adventurous leap and I guess as difficult and daunting as it's going to get; I'll have to stomach my choices.
I could make a meter long list of the things I need to learn to do by next month. I should one day jot them down and request for free tuition from those who are willing to donate their expertise. Hehe. I'm going to be stumbling along the way; and it does bruise my confidence every time; but i'm soldiering on! Baby steps... It's just the beginning.

I can play cards and visit casinos... but I'm not a gambler at heart. It's just something about questioning my decisions that make me a bad gambler. I'm bad with calculating risks and sticking to plans as well. I'm a hard worker; not so much an opportunist.


Shall stick to making Mah Jong pieces out of cake instead of gambling with them! *grin*

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